ALL I EVER WANTED WAS A NICE LOW-FAT ALFREDO SAUCE

INSTEAD I GOT SOMETHING THAT LOOKED LIKE THE TIME I POURED BAILEY’S INTO A GLASS THAT STILL HAD WINE DREGS IN IT

Was it something I said? I’m sorry, I should never have shouted at you, yoghurt, when you splattered all over my shirt. Next time I will treat you right. I will give you all the cornstarch you need and I won’t lose my shit, no matter how precise and time-consuming your heating and stabilising needs are.

Happy sunny Whistable times. Need more weekends like these!

that I wonder why I even sleep at all.

I’m in a really REALLY weird mood where I was sad but then halfway through being sad I realised I don’t like being sad and I don’t want to be sad because I’m not actually sad very often now (this is good) so I started thinking of my reasons to be happy but I ALSO have reasons to be sad right now and there is literally a shit-slinging of emotions going on in my head right now and I won’t get to sleep unless I spew nonsense about it. So. I am going to make some lists because lists make me feel like I’m less of a failure at life in general.

Reasons in my life to be sad:

• I got hit with a £55 phone bill today (it should be £20) that came out of nowhere and because Orange hates everything in the world it makes your itemised bill impossible to understand and completely useless so I still can’t work out how I used 450 extra minutes this month. This means a trip to the Orange shop, which is one other thing to add to my list of things to sort out that I don’t have time to sort out because I work 50 hours a week. If I can’t reclaim it then I have £20 to last me until pay day. Which is 3 weeks away.
• I started working on my university application this evening and realised that every course I want to get into requires an A in Lit at A-level (or equivalent). I got 85% overall in my Lit course in Canada, which, where I was living, was a B. An A was 86. However, I know the grading system is different here but nowhere on the internet will fucking tell me anything useful. So I might be totally within my rights to apply to a decent university, or I might have to overhaul my entire life plan or maybe just crawl under a parked car and wait until it drives away and squishes me.
• Adam still (after 3 months for FUCK’S sake) owes me £60 and won’t pay me back
• I’m really insecure about Bristol and making friends and fitting in. I think Jess’ friends tolerate me but I don’t know if they like me at all.
• I’m pretty sure I have a reverse eating disorder.
• I just watched Serenity *spoiler/nerd alert* and now have to spend the rest of my life knowing that my favourite fictional character of all time died in a really stupid way. Fuck you, Joss Whedon. Again.

Reasons in my life to be happy:

• Summer’s coming along!
• I have at least two festivals which are both gonna be AWESOME
• The deposit’s gone through on the flat and it’s official, it’s ours
• I’m maybe going to China?!
• I’ve been having the best week socially, it’s been amazing! Pictures to follow, except tomorrow when I can work out how to blog because it’s stupid o’clock
• I’m sort of casually seeing someone which is perfect for me right now, seeing as food is the only relationship to which I am willing to commit, most likely ever. But while orgasmic at times, food doesn’t quite make the cut in certain fields. So that’s nice. Ahem.
• I don’t have to be up tomorrow morning! BOOYA

OK I think this shit is out of my system now, I’m going to sleep. Sorry for being a basket case. I’ll probably delete this tomorrow if I feel any better. Unlikely, because that movie just broke my soul, but whatever nobody reads this anyway OK GOONIGHT/MORNING

Diamonds (by kitschcafe)

My glass of wine is coming with me as moral support.

Bristolian Rooftops

Bosque (by javiair80)

Pike Place fish flower market